Corinne Gregory’s latest book in the “Education Reform & Other Myths” series hit #1 on Amazon Kindle today, a week after it’s release.

Today only, Amazon is offering a copy of the book for free to anyone.  Amazon Prime members can continue to get a copy of the book for free and there is also an option to “borrow” it once a month just like in a library.

“Breaking the Bullying Culture” takes a detailed and in-depth view of many of the issues involved with bullying in our schools and communities. It profiles some high-level incidents of bullying and bullycide, as well as some less-publicized cases. The book also examines the popular “solutions” offered in response to bullying and cyber bullying, identifies why these solutions aren’t working as well as we expect, and offers more effective alternatives.

To get your copy of “Breaking the Bullying Culture” click on the link below:

The first book in the series, “The Stumbling Blocks in the System and How to Fix Them” is also available on Amazon at

Be one of the first 10 people to get a copy of either book and write a review and we’ll send you a copy of the other book FREE!  Just contact us with your review details once it’s posted on Amazon and we’ll send you the other book to the email address you provide!

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A recent article in EdWeek shared how the fight against bullying is moving into Congress.  Many people wcongress debates bullying lawould likely cheer that our Federal lawmakers are now taking on the problem of bullying (quick editorial: is it me, or do you find it ironic that CONGRESS is trying to enact laws against bullying…”do as I say?…”)

However, I don’t think this is a reason to get excited, for several reasons:

  • How effective do you really think a federal law against bullying is going to be in stopping the problem? As of this writing 46 states already have laws on the books addressing this issue (for more on this see “You Can’t Bully Me, It’s Against the Law!!”)
  • What is the purpose of this legislation? According to the EdWeek article this legislation is intended to “…protect students from bullying and harassment that would apply to every school and district in the country.”  How, please, explain, HOW will legislation do that? By calling for schools and districts to have policies in place, establish reporting and consequences for violation.  Swell. We have that. What good does it actually do? How did THAT help the 34 kids who killed themselves because of bullying last year?
  • In this proposed legislation, there is a recommendation that special language be included to address bullying of LGBT students. WHY? Yes, the data shows that a high percentage of LGBT students are harassed and bullied. But, news flash: so are non-LGBT kids.  Are you saying, Congress, that students that have alternative sexual preferences are somehow more “special” or deserving of protection than other children? Are you not, then, in fact, discriminating against those children who are unfortunate enough to not fall into your “special categories?”

Let me make the point: bullying is an equal opportunity epidemic. According to Minnestoa Senator Al Franken, 9 out of 10 LBGT students are harassed or bullied.  Ok, that’s a high percentage, I agree. Further, one third of LGBT students report skipping school because they are afraid or don’t feel safe.  Overall, in our nation, over 160,000 kids miss school each day. I’d be interested to see what the percentage of LGBT students are in that 160,000. My guess is that these students make up the minority of kids overall who are scared. Certainly there are more “mainstream” students than there are LGBT, so one could argue that we have MORE mainstream kids to protect than LGBT kids.

We have to get to the real issue here: we need to solve bullying — for all kids, not just LGBT.  Bullying happens because of issues of power. The students who are bullied are picked on because they are PERCEIVED to be different.  Those “differences” can be real — they can be LGBT students, for example. Maybe the student is fat, or skinny, or is poor and doesn’t wear the trendy clothes. But the differences can also be just perceptions: the “smart” kid gets picked on because he or she makes the others feel inadequate or dumb. They pick on a child of German descent, calling him a “Nazi,” or a Muslim student for being a “terrorist.”

The sad truth is that laws will NOT protect kids from bullyingRead More→

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Since the launch of this site, traffic to it has been increasing at a very high rate.  Because of the interest in the topic of cyberbullying and bullying in general, we thought it might be helpful to provide a forum in which visitors can discuss their issues.

So, today we’re happy to announce the Discussion forum is up and live!  You can discuss your own experiences, share problems, suggest solutions, even request help if you need it. You will be asked to register when you participate, but this is because we want to be sure that people posting are “real” and  not individuals looking to take advantage of those participating. Comments are moderated for content and tone. There’s no place for bullying in our cyberbullying solutions website!

It’s our hope that you’ll find this a useful resource in your efforts to stop bullying and cyber bullying in our schools and communities.

To access the forum, click here  or select Discuss! from the main menu.

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On days when I doubt if what I’m saying in my presentations about bullying and cyberbullying makes any difference, I am honored by a comment such as this one. See video comments and feedback from an attendee of today’s “Many Faces of Bullying: Traditional and Online” Workshop I conducted today at the Iowa Library Association’s Annual Conference.


bullying, speaker for bullying, impact of bullying, cyber bullying




Need some of these same impacts and information for your school or organization? Contact Corinne directly to get her on your schedule!

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bullying, cyber bullying, stop bullyingI’m sitting in a plane at 34,000 feet and even here I can’t get away from the topic of bullying. In this week’s People Magazine, there’s an article profiling four families who lost their children to bullycide in 2010.  What the article doesn’t mention is that we KNOW of 34 documented suicides in 2010 caused by bullying. And those only list the ones we know about or can prove a connection to bullying.

For me, the irony is that I’m reading this article as I’m flying to Iowa where I’m presenting both a 3-hour pre-conference workshop on “The Many Faces of Bullying: Traditional and Online — Causes, Effects and What to Do about It” at the Iowa Library Association’s Annual Conference. As is typical of media focus on bullying, the article is high on tragedy and “awareness” but does nothing to suggest a solution. Of course, the implication is that when you read these stories you’ll be left thinking,” Well, this is horrible!  We have to DO something.”  Yes, we do.  But, how long after you watch Anderson Cooper’s latest show on bullying, or once you close the magazine cover will this passion stick with you? Enough to actually take action?

Probably not.  Life is notoriously fickle when it comes to change.  Bullying is not a new problem.  And, in the past several years, it has received an increasing amount of attention, partly because the extent of the tragedies and the impacts not only on students and families, but entire communities, is become more visible. Read More→

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This blog comes to us from Christopher Burgess. You can read more about Christopher, book him as a speaker or consultant here.

This is the first blog from within the veritate et virtute domain

It is fitting, therefore, this particular post revolve around a topic which continues to provide challenges to legislators both in the United States, as well as elsewhere around this small world we share – “Electronic Harassment.”

Electronic Harassment is a polite word for the many of the insidious ills which have regrettably transitioned to the electronic world from the physical world. Lamentably, the physical world’s ills continue apace, and are now magnified by the ubiquitious global online presence, which is only growing exponentially. The most common and well known form of electronic harassment comes to us in two forms “cyberstalking” or “cyberbullying.”

In the United States, 46 of the 50 states have passed legislation addressing the particulars of the electronic world, largely as an adjunct to existing legislation used to protect individuals within the physical world. A good beginning, with much work remaining to be concluded. Only four states have centralized digital evidence laboratories (Arizona, Colorado, Massachusetts, and New Hampshire). Thus none would be surprised to see the backlog of cases involving digital evidence growing, as this evidence often times crosses the physical jurisdictions and thus causes issues of jurisdictional control of data inter-state and intra-state.

The National Council of State Legislatures, has identified only 19 of 50 states as having legislature which specifically addresses “cyberbullying” within the context of their educational systems. These states (and their appropriate legislative acts) are: Read More→

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Today, a picture shared by one of my friends inspired this post.  While it’s a very cute picture in and of itself, I think  it says alot about what our response should be to bullying we observe or hear about.

take a stand against bullying, protecting others, bullying solutionsCertainly we “get” that the stronger dog in this picture is standing guard over the smaller “kid” (as in goat, in this case). But let me tell you what deeper meaning I take from this as well.  Notice how “different” these two are.  They are completely different species, one is “dark” and the other “light.” (Yes, I think we can take race and culture in this meaning as well…)  Yes, one is “stronger” — the dog is clearly the more mature and powerful of the two and it’s natural to think of us protecting the young or disadvantaged.

But a lesson I hope we take from this is that while we may be “different” from someone else, we are more alike than unalike. We all have the same basic needs, wants and dreams.  We want peace, we want to be loved, we want to matter. We want security, we want to belong.

And, we want someone to stand up for US if we were being harassed, teased, or bullied, right? If we felt in danger or frightened, we’d want someone to help US, even if “they” weren’t from our neighborhood, class or culture.

The importance of intervening in bullying cannot be minimized. According to research on the effectiveness of peer intervention on bullying in schools, when peers intervene, bullying stops within 10 seconds, 57% of the time.  Ten seconds. That’s virtually instantaneous. What this says is that we have the power to stop a bullying incident almost immediately, if only we were to step in to help.

It’s statistics and case studies like these that I’ll be sharing with attendees in ten days at the Iowa Library Association’s Annual Conference. Read More→

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A recent fight between two students at Surfside Middle School in Florida has been “up-leveled” to the Internet.  The incident was caught on other students’ cell phones and then posted to Facebook. The parents of the victim are doubly upset, not just because the school staff didn’t break up the fight as it was occurring, but also because their daughter now gets to “relive” the fight again and again via social media.

This really highlights the fuzzy line between what a school can reasonably be responsible for when it comes to anti-social student behavior.  Certainly, physical assault and bullying on school property is within their area of responsibility. But, what happens when students continue the negative behavior off school time?

It’s interesting because I was just asked this question during a recent webinar I gave on “7 Steps to Eliminate Bullying in Schools: An Inside-Out Approach.” The question was about how a school should go about developing an effective bullying policy.  I pointed out that a policy that addresses “traditional bullying” (physical, verbal, social) while on school property is pretty straightforward. But what happens when you begin to consider cyber bullying — do you include only what happens on school property, during school time, perhaps using only school resources? What do you in a case like this one at Surfside, where the cyber bullying occurs with students’ own cell phones and the media gets posted to their personal Facebook accounts? If it was done during school time, that’s one thing, but how does a policy apply if they do it while at home? What if the bullying occurs through students posting inflammatory comments or untruths about a teacher on social media? Where does “freedom of speech” and expression extend to harassment and libel?

As you can see, it’s a difficult question and a complex issue. Schools and districts need to be very careful how they define policies and consequences to make sure they are not only reasonable and practical, but also enforceable. AND, they need to consider this in the context of prevailing laws and legislation. It’s something that, ideally, should be done with the help of experts because there is no cookie-cutter way of dealing with it.

Of course, the bigger issue what motivates the anti-social behavior to begin with, but we’ll tackle that in another post.


P.S. Need help developing a good bullying policy that includes issues of cyber bullying and cybersecurity?  Check the Resources page for our expert help.

Categories : cyber bullying
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Tonight, CBS News “48 Hours” program is going to air a special on bullying called “Words Can Kill.” I’ve seen this coming for a long time and am eager to see how it turns out.  Last Spring, I was in repeated, lengthy conversations with Kathleen O’Connell and Deb Grau about the plans for the show and shared a lot of information with them. I was also actively working with them to help them find a school that was willing to go “on the record” about bullying and talk about steps they were taking to solve bullying in their schools.

As it turns out, the schools I had introduced them to didn’t follow through after several rounds of talks, so they (and we) weren’t included, but I’m hopeful that the background info I provided was helpful to the program’s efforts.

I’ve seen the sneak peak (and you can view it here), and it looks interesting.  Cynthia Logan who is an online “friend” of mine because of the tragic loss of her daughter, Jessie, to bullycide is extensively interviewed. From what I’ve seen, however, I’m worried that this piece is going to be only more of the same of what we’ve already seen: awareness of the problem and exposure to how horrible it is.

Where are the solutions? One Middle School in Rhode Island is profiled, taking an active stand against bullying. But, what about other approaches? Stopping bullying requires a comprehensive approach, one that deals in both prevention and remediation. As I shared in a webinar completed yesterday, it takes both a strategy and an implementation plan. In fact, we’ve outlined seven steps that are really required to not only stop bullying now, but also to keep it from recurring.  I’ll be intersted to see what this school is doing; most “plans” stop after Step 3, and then they wonder why nothing significantly changes.

What the biggest hope I have of this piece is that it causes schools to reevaluate how important it is to take greater steps in solving this problem.  If the predominant attitude is: “well, we can’t afford to do more,” or “we already have a program/policy in place,” then the 48 Hours project isn’t going to much to change that attitude.  It will likely spur greater reaction among parents, who will find the horror of what occurred in several of these bullying and cyber bullying cases appalling.  But, they may not have much influence on the schools who feel that budget and time pressures prevent them from implementing other options.

Ultimately, I don’t think we need more awareness. Read More→

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Cracking down on cyber bullying?

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While doing some research for an upcoming paper and workshop on cyber bulling, I stumbled across a very interesting chart. Put out by the Cyberbully Research Center, this chart presents a quick and concise view of the status of States’ varying bullying and cyber bullying laws. As I write this, its information is quite current, having just been updated.

According to the chart, presently 46 states in the US either have or have proposed bullying laws.  Currently, neither Montana nor South Dakota have laws, nor are there any pending. Only eight states actually use the specific term “cyber bullying” (or cyberbullying, depending on your spelling) in their law, but 34 do include online harassment. You really have to drill down to individual States’ laws to see how the distinction, if any, is made.

But, in this document, you can do that.  After the summary chart, there is a listing, state by state, of the relevant legislation and a quick synopsis of its contents. In many cases, there is an actual link to the text of the law or bill involved.

Because I’m based in Washington State, I naturally popped right down there to see what it said. Apparently, it added specific text including “cyberbullying” to the RCW (Revised Code of Washington), but the law specifies that cyberbullying has been added to the Harassment and Bullying Act for which all schools must have a policy.  It would be interesting to see how many of our public schools and districts HAVE such an amended policy in place.  Of course, the legislation doesn’t specify what the policy should consist of or do, or how effectiveness is to be measured.  The problem is with policies is that they are just “serving suggestions,” and it depends on HOW you implement them and how well they are enforced.  A policy on its own won’t buy you much…except state compliance. (For more on this discussion of the value of legislation, you may want to visit You Can’t Bully Me, It’s Against the Law!)

Massachusetts’ specifics are interesting.  Certainly spurred by the tragic death of Phoebe Prince, there is quite a bit of reference to bullying both within school boundaries and time, as well as outside of school. Moreover, schools must provide training to their staff annually about what the relevant policies in place at the school are.  But, what about training and education for the students? Perhaps that is implied in the policies adopted by the schools, but I’m surprised they would mandate training for the staff, but not the ones actually responsible for most of the bullying and cyber bullying.

In Kansas, they did actually add the term “cyberbullying” and defined it at the State level. However, it’s up to the schools to decide the appropriate punishment.

So I guess what I get from all this is that while there is greater attention being paid to cyber bullying — and bullying overall, — when we say “there’s a law” it doesn’t necessarily mean that the States are cracking down on the problem.  It may mean they have defined the term, and have included it in their legislation, but I’m not sure how much teeth it has when the “law” says that “you aren’t supposed to do it, but we’ll leave it up to the schools to define the punishment.”

Maybe I’m missing something, but doesn’t that seem to be a lot of time, energy and money spent for something that doesn’t even DO anything, really about the problem? How will THIS stop cyber bullying in our schools and communities, is what I want to know. Otherwise I’m not sure the “law” is worth the paper it’s written on, much less the cost of passing it.

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